inner landscape, Monotype of the Day #371

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Day 6 of Year 2

This week has been incredibly busy, very little empty time. It's so hard to work without that silence in my life. Next week I am going to slow things down, without that space its really hard for the creative flow to get in. I have the feeling that I haven't fully honored my sacred contract to work this week. It's not just about being in the studio, it's also about caring for yourself so when you work you are present and ready. I know it's not my job to judge my own work, but I feel this week's prints reflect the lack of space.
I didn't start this monotype until about midnight so there's no time to rework it. I really love the concept, but I haven't hit it yet. There's a feeling I get when an image a right that I don't have. I'm not a huge fan of this flesh tone either. I almost never use it. I think I will try a different approach tomorrow. This print is much bigger than most of my others. I included a pencil for scale.


Praise Them
by Li-Young Lee

The birds don’t alter space.
They reveal it. The sky
never fills with any
leftover flying. They leave
nothing to trace. It is our own
astonishment collects
in chill air. Be glad.
They equal their due
moment never begging,
and enter ours
without parting day. See
how three birds in a winter tree
make the tree barer.
Two fly away, and new rooms
open in December.
Give up what you guessed
about a whirring heart, the little
beaks and claws, their constant hunger.
We’re the nervous ones.
If even one of our violent number
could be gentle
long enough that one of them
found it safe inside
our finally untroubled and untroubling gaze,
who wouldn’t hear
what singing completes us?

xoxo

Floating, Monotype of the Day #370

Day of 5 of Year 2

Still playing with techniques and color and enjoying it greatly. I was so exhausted tonight I really didn't know if I could do much in the studio. I prepped a small plate (8 x 10") and started working. As usual, and always miraculously, the energy came. It was a wave, a gift, just enough to do my print and get back to my chair. 🙂 Why does this gift come each night to my studio to sustain me in the face of so many obstacles? I show up (the artist) and do my best to surrender to The Artist. It is a relationship that needs commitment, nurturing and love to grow. I am grateful

Don't Make Lists
by Dorothy Walters

Every day a new flower rises
from your body's fresh soil.
Don't go around looking
for fallen petals
in a fairy tale, when you've
got the golden plant
right here, now,
shooting forth in light from your eyes,
your awakening crown.

Don't make lists,
or explore ancient accounts.
Forget everything you know
and open.

the artist has hope, Monotype of the Day #369

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Day 4 of Year 2

The swimming person and the boat are back. Symbols have power and energy. They act as windows between world, temporarily lifting the veil. Sometimes the same symbols come up over and over, until their job is done, until they infuse their energies into the artist and world. The act of making them changes an artist. This often happens unconsciously through the steady beat of work, transforming silently until suddenly their meaning surfaces. Then they drop away and make room for new images wanting to bring change and be known.

the artist is watching, Monotype of the Day #368

Day 3 of Year 2

I definitely felt more in the flow today and working larger, on a full sheet of paper 22x30", is fun. I'm feeling landscapes are still in my future, but returning to self-portrait is always helpful in recentering. So much of art is staying through discomfort: the discomfort of pieces not "turning out", the fights and arguments with misbehaving materials, the emotions that come up in the silence of working. Staying through allows all of this to dissipate and something new to emerge. After a few days of struggle, I'm feeling excited again to see what comes.

Learn the backward step
that turns your light inward
to illuminate your self.
Body and mind of themselves
will drop away,
and your original face will be manifest.
by Dogen

xoxo

as above so below revisited ghost print, Monotype of the Day #367

Day 2 of Year 2

There's been a lot of drama at my house this week. Nothing serious, not health issues, just the tougher stuff of life rearing it's unwanted head. It's put me off my game in the studio. So what does an artist do when their flow is interrupted? They play. It's a wonderful opportunity to try new things without any expectation that they will work out. It's pure enjoyment and exploration with zero pressure and it's a really important part of being an artist. Without play it is so easy to get stuck in your ways. Instead of clinging to an idea of what was working, I've let myself go (and that doesn't just mean forgetting to brush my hair! 😊) Old structures need to crumble to make space for new. Let them crumble while I play and soon enough I'll have my flow back.

BTW, a ghost print is a second print made from ink that is left on the plate from the first print. Swipe to see the first print that the ghost was made from.

Is my soul asleep?
By Antonio Machado

Is my soul asleep?
Have those beehives that labor
at night stopped? And the water-
wheel of thought,
is it dry, the cups empty,
wheeling, carrying only shadows?

No, my soul is not asleep,
It is awake, wide awake.
It neither sleeps nor dreams, but watches,
its clear eyes open,
far-off things, and listens
at the shores of the great silence.

xoxo

sunrise, Monotype of the Day #365

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One year! And something totally different again, a sunrise, full of optimism. It's been quite an adventure of late in the studio. I have no idea at all what will come out. One year of prints everyday without fail through all my ups and downs, through hospital stays, trips and grumpiness, feels like a big occasion. But I'm treating it like any other day, a chance to get down to work and see what will happen. Tomorrow I'll be back in the studio again. Year two, day one.

As I look back over the year I feel such intense gratitude for all the changes this project has brought to my life. I've grown as an artist and a person. The constant wash of creative flow through me has worn away so many rough edges like a river smooths a stone. I've felt the immeasurable power of showing transform my life and open opportunities and connections. I have formed a deep faith in the value of working. As those of you who follow me regularly know, I had a difficult spring with 3 hospitals stays. It was working that carried me through, even as fever and an operation pulled me down. Touching the creative flow healed me and brought me back to life. Over the course of this year, I've had an intimate, life changing conversation, artist to Artist (the source of all creativity). It has been profoundly private and also more public than anything I've ever done- two opposites almost mystically coexisting in one moment. I've experienced great beauty, sorrow and joy while working and now I am filled with gratitude. My profound thanks to everyone who is following my journey and all the support I have received from you. The comments, likes and sales mean the world to me. If you are not a commenter, know that I feel and value your support. Although I would still be in the studio without you all, your presence this year has made everything so much sweeter and you are dear to me. A special thanks to Barry Echtman, without whose support so much would remain undone and all my artist friends!

As once the winged energy of delight
by Rainer Maria Rilke, Trans. Stephen Mitchell

As once the winged energy of delight
carried you over childhood’s dark abysses,
now beyond your own life build the great
arch of unimagined bridges.

Wonders happen if we can succeed
in passing through the harshest danger;
but only in a bright and purely granted
achievement can we realize the wonder.

To work with Things in the indescribable
relationship is not too hard for us;
the pattern grows more intricate and subtle,
and being swept along is not enough.

Take your practiced powers and stretch them out
until they span the chasm between two
contradictions… For the god
wants to know himself in you.

———————

See you tomorrow

xoxo

the landing, Monotype of the Day #364

I had a really hard day today. Some days are like that, it's just the nature of things. It threw me off in the studio tonight. I wasn't in the flow and working felt labored. The boat is coming into shore though so something is shifting. That's always good news. I'm grateful for the ability to show up and work. Posting a print I have mixed feelings about isn't easy but my faith is in process not in product. It's my job to work and I'll leave the rest to others. Tomorrow will be one year, I'm not intending to stop. I'm also doing my best not to think about tomorrow or plan. It's just a day like any other. I will show up in my studio and I will work.

This work is paired with "A Carbon-Based Life Form" by Jane Hirshfield.

Reas it here: https://static1.squarespace.com/static/59de49838dd041430865b945/t/5a817b69ec212d8118318b07/1518435178666/3Hirshfield2.01.pdf

distant storm, Monotype of the Day #363

Holy cow! Where is this work coming from? I am amazed at this sudden departure into landscape. I can't judge this work at all. Part of this project is to post the good, the bad, and the ugly so my assessment doesn't really matter. Not everyday in the studio is a good day in terms of output. However, everyday in the studio is a good day when an artist shows up to work, a good result is icing on the cake. So I'm not judging, but I still feel way out of my comfort zone. Anxious, jittery but exhilarated. Interestingly, the personal meaning of these landscapes is so much clearer to me than the figurative work. I am chasing the feelings in these newer pieces. I take heart because this energy is pouring through me onto the page and it cannot help but effect me for the better. Each time I am able to grow, that positively effects the people around me. That's what it's all about, how can we soften to love the people around us more deeply.

Whatever this is
By Dorothy Walters

What is it,
this channeling god,
these words pouring through
like love strokes of light,
these syllables taking over
becoming flesh, my flowing veins,
I cannot remember
when it was not this way,
when my blood did not ache
for whatever this is.

soul fire, Monotype of the Day #362

This is the first monotype I have ever made that does not contain a living creature of some sort whether it be person, bird, or even monster. It's a strange and unsettling feeling. I tried to put a figure in but every time I was stopped, that blocked feeling came up. Finally, I surrendered and now am sitting here being present to the anxiety the lack of figure is producing. That so much emotional can surface from leaving a figure out is surprising and illuminating. It's so easy to become stuck in comfortable ways but internal magic happens when we embrace change. I seem to be going through an emptying process. I's uncomfortable but I am here for it. We shall see what happens.

I love everything about tonight's poem except the use of the pronoun he. However, I'm willing to overlook it for now 😊

Via Negativa
by R. S. Thomas

Why no! I never thought other than
That God is that great absence
In our lives, the empty silence
Within, the place where we go
Seeking, not in hope to
Arrive or find. He keeps the interstices
In our knowledge, the darkness
Between stars. His are the echoes
We follow, the footprints he has just
Left. We put our hands in
His side hoping to find
It warm. We look at people
And places as though he had looked
At them, too; but miss the reflection.

xo

midnight, Monotype of the Day #361

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I noticed my figures for the last 3 days have all been kneeling in prayer. It's unusual to make the same pose so many days in a row. Usually unusual things are precious and meaningful if we take the time to investigate. I meditated on my repeated poses and this print is what came. I know I've posted Mary Oliver's poem Prayer before, but it gets to the heart of this print. There is a deep silence, a quietness, which is essential to making art. It has been an incredibly busy few weeks and as much as I love being in the world, my artist soul still craves the emptiness from which new work is born. I am on a quest to find the balance between silence and sound.

Praying
By Mary Oliver

It doesn’t have to be
the blue iris, it could be
weeds in a vacant lot, or a few
small stones; just
pay attention, then patch

a few words together and don’t try
to make them elaborate, this isn’t a contest but the doorway

into thanks, and a silence in which another voice may speak.

fishing, Monotype of the Day #360

I put it all into the print tonight. I am empty of words.

The Drop and the Sea
by Kabir, trans. Andrew Harvey

I went looking for Him
And lost myself;
The drop merged with the Sea --
Who can find it now?

Looking and looking for Him
I lost myself;
The Sea merged with the drop --
Who can find it now?

by the light of the moon, Monotype of the Day #359

Interesting, I'm still learning so much with this new ink. This was a blue black ink that I mixed and the paper turned it green. That's the adventure of making art. You never know what will happen. Happy surprises abound!

Today I had a really lovely studio visit, a nice couple. They purchased one of my favorite prints (I'll post the picture tomorrow) and when they left I noticed I had a huge thick swatch of dark ink on my upper lip. Basically I had given myself a Hitler mustache. Oy, is really the only word that adequately describes the feeling! Of course I was mortified. But then I reflected on the kindness they showed me in not mentioning it. Instead of beating myself up, I took their example and practiced kindness toward myself. The mortification (mostly 😊) turned to laughter. So many times in life we go to self-blame and miss the opportunity for kindness. Kindness really changes everything. Could I have made the same print tonight, if I was still giving myself a hard time? I doubt it.

Poem by Dogen

Enlightenment is like the moon reflected on the water.
The moon does not get wet, nor is the water broken.
Although its light is wide and great,
The moon is reflected even in a puddle an inch wide.
The whole moon and the entire sky
Are reflected in one dewdrop on the grass.

Peace, Monotype of the Day #358

After finishing photographing all my prints, I've moved to the next phase- sorting and inventory. It's an interesting process to revisit my work. I find that some images repeat. They evolve, but some same core structure is there. This is true of tonight's print. Several years ago I made a similar series. At first I was bothered, but realized this image is a key to unlocking certain feelings in me, in this case peace. Some of the images that come through are an expression of my feelings and some, probably most, are a message, a transfer of energy and they change me. I needed this image tonight and definitely am more at peace since making it. Although some pieces are more successful than others as works of art, they all play a roll in my own growth and healing. When I see an image has evolved, I take heart. Progress is being made even if it hasn't yet shown up outside my work. This brings me a great deal of peace, knowing I've found my place and my work is progressing.

Wild Geese
By Mary Oliver

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

xo

Found, Monotype of the Day #357

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I am trying to clear my mind. I have been pushing to get all my prints catalogued, my website updated (coming soon) and complete a number artistic housekeeping items. It's a different part of the brain. So tonight I thought for a brief and sublime second I had photographed every print in my studio. But then I found one I had missed and it was so disappointing. Not that it matters really because I just went to my plate a made another. I would have had all my prints photographed for a total of an hour. These silly things the mind gets fixated on! So I knew I had to recenter and connect to what really matters. I love tonight's poem. xoxo

Moments of Joy
By Denise Levertov

A scholar takes a room on the next street,
the better to concentrate on his unending work, his word,
his world. His grown children
feel bereft. He comes and goes while they sleep.
But at times it happens a son or daughter
wakes in the dark and finds him sitting
at the foot of the bed
in the old rocker: sleepless
i his old coat, gazing
into invisible distance, but clearly there to protect
as he had always done. The child springs up and flings
arms about him, presses
a cheek to his temple, taking him by surprise,
and exclaims, 'Abba!' - the old, intimate name
from the days of infancy.
And the old scholar, the father,
is deeply glad to be found.
That's how it is, Lord, sometimes:
You seek, and I find.