It's so easy to judge ourselves as not doing or being enough, but often this is so far out of our control. The circumstances of life offer so many constraints. Sometimes what is called for is showing up and just surrendering to what is. Doing what is possible and then trusting in it's value whether it falls short of our desired outcome or not. This is an important survival skill for someone dealing with long-term illness.
Mozart, for Example
by Mary Oliver, from Thirst
All the quick notes
Mozart didn’t have time to use
before he entered the cloud boat
are falling now from the beaks
of the finches
that have gathered from the joyous summer
into the hard winter
and, like Mozart, they speak of nothing
but light and delight,
though it is true, the heavy blades of the world
are still pounding underneath.
And this is what you can do too, maybe,
if you live simply and with a lyrical heart
in the cumbered neighborhoods or even,
as Mozart sometimes managed to, in a palace,
offering tune after tune after tune,
making some hard-hearted prince
prudent and kind, just by being happy.